“Can you hear me now?” the man says as he gets further and further away from ‘civilization.’ The person on the other end of the connection can always hear him, no matter where he is. The point? This phone company is well connected. I think that’s what we all do, as well. No matter where we are, we stay connected. Even if it’s not on the same PLANE. I talk to Mom all the time, feel her with me, solidly. Sure, it’s still not the same as hearing her voice or hugging her, but it’s still really good and real. I’m thinking of my connections with those whom I’m no longer in contact with, from hurt feelings or destructive incidences. When asked how I felt about a certain family member, I thought I may still feel angry, but was surprised to say I felt sad. I’m afraid for this person - the choices they’re making, how they’ve pushed everyone away, how they’ve created a reality of isolation and hurt. I’m sad we’re not connected on the physical plane anymore. I don’t know when/if we ever will be, but I DO know we’re connected on a spiritual level. I send this person love every night when I say my prayers, I send them healing and gentle thoughts so they can heal from their wounds.
Pema Chodron speaks of tonglen meditation, of connecting with painful experiences or people and actually breathing them IN to your body, then breathing OUT love and healing to them. It sounds counterintuitive, but it makes sense to me, so that’s what I’m thinking about today. Trying to gentle my feelings all around - gentle them toward the President, gentle them toward the vaccine producers, gentle them toward a sister, and this other family member. Take the heat off and neutralize my anger, frustrations, sadness, impatience with love and acceptance and unconditional love. Is it possible to love someone or something even if they are unkind, deceptive, unaware, seemingly uncaring? I think that’s probably when it’s most crucial because that’s when we’re called to be our best selves, to look beyond the surface to the real person underneath. Why are they unkind? They’re probably not happy, and probably NEED us to be kind to them, to be understanding, to try to help them however we can to heal from their hurts that are causing them to be unkind. It’s a spiritual practice for us then, to be kind exactly when we would rather be bitchy and cold. Yup - it’s difficult to stay awake and aware. It’s easier to just tune out and go automatic. That’s what we do. But that doesn’t mean it’s right for us, or the best choice. In a perfect world we would always be able to take correct action in all situations that would help everybody the most. It’s what helps us stay connected. We are anyway, I think, it’s just a matter of if we are aware of our connections. Are they secure and direct? Or are they frayed and gunked up? If we’re all connected anyway, I’d rather have my connections with everybody and everything in the Universe be open and clear and clean. Clean the pipes, so to speak. What’s the universal cleaner? Love, I think.
So I put on my rubber gloves, roll up my sleeves and get to work cleaning up my connections I have with those that are ‘difficult.’ Yes, it’s going to take some elbow grease, some hard work and attention and time and intention, but it’s worth it. This needs to get done, for ME, okay, but also for everyone else. How can I best help the world? This is my constant question. And I’m working the answer.