The red carpet event for “Beautiful Women” made it onto Entertainment Tonight. I feel the energy building, and I wonder how far it will ripple - out to the rest of the Universe, I’m thinking. Although I’m still editing “Dress Gray” for Dad, I’ve decided to go ahead and keep writing my book about Mom and I. I’m so glad I blogged through it all, and even kept a journal for some of the tough stuff. In organizing, I found this today, so would like to present it to you as a very real snapshot of my last week with my mom. I was devoted to her, and will remain so for the rest of my life.
“I know that Mom understands us, but is too tired to talk, so I keep telling her I love her, and that she is loved, and keep stroking her face. She liked it when I ran a warm washcloth over her closed eyes. She smiled and nodded. I’m so glad I can be here with her and Dad. There is no other place to be. I miss Steve and Fargo, but they will be there when I am done with this. Everything will be there, but later, after I am through here. For right now, I’m just present, totally breathing into each moment, watching Mom’s peaceful face as she lies in bed, breathing. Just breathing. She’s alive right now.”
I’m not sure of the date, because it was attached to some other writing, but I remember that time as if I were there now with her. It’s funny how I’ve cycled through so much with her, and yet here I arrive again, full circle, aching from wanting to be with her again in this physical world. “Devotion.” That’s the name of my book. And it’s for you, Mom. Well, it’s for US. I love you.