Do you ever feel like you signed up for something, that if you’d known beforehand what it was, you wouldn’t have signed up for it? I’m feeling like this is THAT kind of lifetime. I remember someone asking me if I would do something, in a meditation many, many years ago, and I said yes without a second thought. I saw a host of heavenly angels singing in the skies, I was given a beautiful cloak and crown, and everyone was really, really happy. I remember vaguely thinking, “Gees, I wonder what I signed up for?”
I’m not complaining, really. I’m sure the symbolic cloak and crown are just super cool and stuff, it’s just that all of that pomp and circumstance doesn’t do one iota of good for me down here on the physical plane, especially not for these past few weeks. Especially not since January. When I first started working with all of ‘this’ (whatever all that means), I remember being able to gauge when the next shift would happen, and coined the phrase “Shift happens.” [not that I was the only one who coined that phrase, but I did catch the significance of it really early on] In the beginning I thought “after this next shift, it will be over - phew!” It’s only been in these past few energy ‘upheavals’ [I no longer call them ‘shifts’ as that term signifies a slight turning - upheaval is the entire foundation underneath you breaking apart and falling away - yes, that is more accurate] that I’ve come to understand that there is no ‘easy’ in this work until it is all complete. Until we are 100% Soul Incarnate in our human bodies, and I don’t know about you, but I’m afraid I’ve got a long way to go!
If a person wants to be a champion bodybuilder, she must keep INCREASING her weights and reps, not lighten them up. But if she does it correctly, she will build muscle at a steady speed, and reach her goals eventually. She doesn’t want to ease up and just sit around - that won’t build her muscles. Nor does she want to keep at the same weight and reps - that won’t build her muscles. BUT [and that’s a BIG but] she also doesn’t want to go balls to the wall and lift 24/7 without a break. That will break her. She will have injuries and that will cause her to HAVE to sit out for a while, which inevitably will slow her progress.
What that means to me, then, when translated into this work of becoming 100%, is that we need to look at how we’re going through this spiritual bodybuilding. What type of bodybuilder are you? How do you approach your training? Do you realize that it’s YOU that wants to build yourself, and not look to others to blame for your sweat and aches at the gym? Do you complain when you’re in the middle of the workout [your difficult spiritual growth times], bitching because you don’t want to be there, wanting to be done, wanting to be somewhere else? Do you workout TOO much? Even top bodybuilders take rests, and work on different areas at different times. What’s your attitude? What are your goals? If you think about it that way you then find ways to work WITH the process, not against it. You find ways to breathe through the pain, relax in the off times, rejoice in your growing prowess.
That all makes sense to me as I grapple with strange health issues of extreme dizziness, a mysterious bump on my nose, and aching left foot. Am I working out too much? I think so. Am I interested in doing something different? Hells yeah, if this ISN’T going to get any easier, that means my old ways of doing things will not help me, and whatever discomfort I’m experiencing will most likely increase as time goes by. NO THANK YOU! I’m all for the path of least resistance, and it’s up to each of us to define what that means to us. I just know that I’m doing this thing - I’m in it to win it, and in it for the duration. I support you in your journey, as well, and together we’ll keep walking and keep waking.